Dear Diary
by nawelkay
Summary: Dear Diary, the other day I noticed that giving a call to Charlie was the equivalent of giving a call to a tree. I'm now trying to figure out why I can't bring myself to put an end to my relationship with a tree.
1. Chapter 1

Hello guys ! So this story revolves around Mary Elisabeth as I fucking fell in love with her watching the Perks movie. She's holding this diary where she writes everything about her life - her life including Sam, Charlie, Patrick and everyone. Some of the events will be just like in the book but I'll also make stuff up. Anyway, I hope you'll enjoy this story :).

_Nawel_

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Dear Diary,

Remember that boy I told you about ages ago ? The one who started hanging with Sam and Patrick and looked quite unusual ?

Well, I've get to know him. And thing is, he's great. Great as in very nice and caring. Incredibly nice to be honest, I had never met anyone like him before. He is quite (very) sensitive as well and listens to great music and reads books. Like actual books, not comics or any of this bullshit. He's good looking also and the other day he was wearing that suit that Patrick got him, and I just felt all weird all of a sudden, I felt _attracted_ to him ; like, can you believe it, my badass and independant self attracted to a young and fragile boy. Wow. Anyway, I've thought about it and I want to invite him to the Sadie Hawkins dance the school is holding. I fucking love the Sadie Hawkins concept, being the feminist I am; I bet guys feel freaking vulnerable while we're the one inviting (more like I _wish_ they feel that way). We could have a great time, just dancing, maybe he'll even kiss me goodbye and wrap his hands around my waist ? Fucking cheesiest thing I've ever written; oh god. But at the same time, I'm so afraid that he'll say no. I mean we have barely ever actually talk, and I must look like a total weirdo to him. And I feel like he's into Sam. But maybe he's not ? I'll guess I should just ask him out and see what happen. Yeah, I'm definitely doing this.

Anyway, there was something else I wanted to tell you about. The other day, Sam and I went to this bar and got very drunk. I guess we were looking quite decent because loads of guys came and started talking to us while touching our thighs. We didn't react because we were so drunk (otherwise I'd have fucking slap them while screaming feministic slogans). I remember I started kissing one of them. Then he left and another one came and kissed me. Then I woke up in the ladies' room. And this is fucking terrifying me, even though my clothes were still on. I asked Sam about it, and she told me that when she left with some random guy, I was busy kissing another one at the bar. So I guess it happened when she was already gone. But the thing is, what happened ? I have no clue. Did I get raped ? But what if I wanted to do it when I was drunk ? I wish I knew. I haven't told anybody about this except for Sam; she just told me to forget about it and that I probably just fell asleep after throwing my guts up. I still did a pregnancy test though and I'm not pregnant; cheers !

I should get some sleep because I have school tomorrow. Talking about school, I happen to really like the litterature course those days; I might be taking it at college, and become a fabulous writer; just kidding, but I really fucking like going mental over those crazy talented writers. Books are so great, for real. And I've found a new interest in watching the school football games, so sometimes I just go and sit and cheer. Footbool is not as dumb as I thought it was, I'd actually like to try one day. But I'm a girl. Fucking sexists.

I'll tell you all about the - wait I hadn't even told about the very nice boy being named Charlie - "me asking Charlie out" thing next time.

xxx

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_How did you find this ? It'd be nice having some reviews :)_


	2. Chapter 2

Dear Diary,

I've got some exciting new here ! Wel not _that_ exciting, but still. So I went and meet Charlie to ask him about the Sadie Hawkins thing and I was feeling really shy when I really shouldn't, because it's not like Charlie is the most popular kid in the highschool or something, even if I really do like him. He was leaning against the wall outside of the school, smoking with Patrick, and I called out for him. He sounded quite surprised and confused to be honest, as I don't usually talk to him and I think I freak him out a little. I really didn't know how to start so I just went straight to the point 'Will you go to the Sadie Hawkins dance with me ?'. And guess what, he wasn't even aware of what it was. I had to explain the whole concept of girls inviting guys, and that I wanted to go with him as he is a nice guy and we could get to know each other more. His face when I was on about the 'getting to know each other more' part made me wanna run away but I didn't, because I'm not a pussy right ? So I just waiting for his answer, longest seconds of my life. If he had said no I think I'd just had to change my identity/move school. BUT he said 'Yes'. The most flat yes ever if you ask me but still a yes. And he added a little smile to make him look more happy about hanging out with me than he actually was. But I can't complain, I'm going to the dance with the cute guy I like, so I guess I'm happy.

Yesterday Sam came over and she was quite devastated. Her relationship with Craig isn't doing as well as it sounded; apparently some friends of him saw her at the bar the other night, when we hanged out, and she had drunk too much and kissed a guy, but no big deal really. However Craig's friend thought it'd be a good idea to make out a whole story about Sam sleeping with that guy. And now Sam's trying to convince Craig that it isn't true, but it's quite hard from what she's told me. Craig's pretty much a cunt if you ask me; I don't even think that he actually cares about her, but I don't tell her because I don't know about half of the things that happen between them. And Sam seems to really like him, and I want her to be happy and maybe Craig will change for the better.I told her again about my worries about the other night in the club, and she said that if I don't remember anything it's probably because nothing happened. She also said that if I wasn't pregnant there was nothing to worry about. I told her that the idea of a stranger touching me while I wasn't me was sickening me. She really seemed to understand and hugged me. It's weird because Sam and I are so different and have argue so many times, but she's still the greatest friend I have. I love her so fucking much.

Oh, I also asked her about Charlie liking her, and she said that he maybe have a little crush on her but nothing really serious, and that I could easily 'turn his world upside down', all smirking. For some reason, this made me laugh to tears and I'm still laughing remembering it. Oh my god Sam.

That's it for today, more info on miss Mary-Elisabeth (not so) exciting life next time.

xxx


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